5 Super Easy Ways To Get Over Your Fear of Failure
If you’ve ever had a stroke of genius or just an inkling that the idea you just had or the vision you’ve written down or the plans you’ve made can even remotely change your life in a positive way, then chances are, you’ve experienced the commonly associated emotional response that comes with it- a fear of failure.
What if it bombs? What if I completely humiliate myself? What if I’m wrong? What if it doesn’t work? All these what-ifs crowd your personal space and flood your mind and oftentimes stop you from even getting your idea or your big plan off the ground.
Replacing your negative what-ifs with more positive ones is the first step in the direction of overcoming your fear of failure, but how do we get to the place where we’re willing to make that step at all? How exactly do you get all your stars aligned and all the pieces in place to overcome your fear of failure?
Clarify your definition
One of the main reasons fear has been whipping us for the better part of our lives is because we don’t truly understand what it is. Many people today if asked would tell you that failure is the opposite of success. When viewed like that, failure becomes an enemy. Something to be avoided at all costs. Something to be ashamed of or even hide. However, if we rip the mask off the face of fear and see it for what it really is then we’d start making real progress in our lives.
Failure is not the opposite of success. It is the main ingredient.
Would you expect to make soup without water or alfredo without pasta?
Would you expect it to rain without a few leaves on the outside getting wet? Or to stick your hand in a flame without it getting burnt? If your answer is no (which I hope it is) then you’ll understand why expecting to succeed without ever encountering failure makes just about as much sense as water-less soup or inflammable hands.
Failure is inevitable. It has to happen. It’s a part of the process.
If you aren’t failing at anything, it simply means you’re not trying anything new.
The numbers game
If you suck at playing baseball or cricket, then you may have a difficulty hitting a moving target with a bat (just an assumption). If five balls are bowled your way and you miss all five then and then stop after swinging at all five, then you’ll never hit the ball. What happened when you swing that bat five more times? And then another five and another and so on.
A few things start to happen:
Your arm gets stronger
Your swing gets better
Your focus gets sharper
You learn from your mistakes
You get tired
And eventually, you’ll hit the ball!
As a matter-of-fact, after a while you won’t be able to miss the ball if you tried.
The more swings you take, the more chances you need, the more attempts you go after, the more you fail, the higher your percentage chance of ever succeeding. It’s all in the numbers. Success is the inevitability of a well used failure. Never waste a perfect failure. Learn from it. Grow from it and continue to go.
Change your input
Whether you’re a newbie to the debilitating fear of failure or a veteran like the rest of us, you know that it comes from your input. Or do you know?
We were all taught how to fear failure. That’s not something we were born with, because it’s not something that would serve us well. We were born with other fears but failure was not one of them. A baby learning how to walk does not care how many times it has to fall before it learns how to get up on both legs and waddle confidently across a room with a proud grin on its face.
The good news is, if we can learn how to fear failure then that means we can unlearn it.
By changing the things we read, listen to and the people we allow to speak into our lives, we can positively change our thought patterns, which includes the habit of fear.
Once we eliminate that negative thought pattern, then we can be on our way to replacing it with more positive thoughts.
Is it worth it?
Whenever you find yourself about to wimp out due to fear, ask yourself this question: is it worth it?
Whenever we let fear get the best of us, the ripple effect is that the thing we want, that burning desire that’s on the other side of fear, never actually becomes ours.
So which one is more valuable to you?
The goal you wish to accomplish or the comfort of your fears?
The fear itself may not be comfortable, but it will most definitely keep you trapped in your comfort zone, and we all know the comfort zone is where dreams go to die.
Get honest with yourself in the moment and answer honestly, is it worth it?
There are some important things that we forget in the heat of the moment. In our worst moments of fear, one of those things that we forget is that fear is neither final nor permanent. If you accept failure for what it really is and keep moving, you’ll see that the failure you experience is just a pit-stop on the way to your final destination. Failure only becomes permanent if you stop moving. Remind yourself that your failure is just for a moment. Take notes, learn from it, milk it dry, thank it for stopping by and then draw a line in the sand and keep it moving.
Put up reminders everywhere about the true face of failure, it’s real nature and how important it actually not just to your personal growth but to your success.
Being a coward will get us nowhere at top speed.
To get to new heights, we’ll experience challenges. We’ll try things that we’ve never tried before and because we’re human, we may fail. Sometimes more than once, sometimes publicly and often in grand style. Enjoy the heck out of it and keep it moving. Even the worst and most devastating failures have life lessons that will help you on your way. Choose to see them and you’ll find the strength to overcome.
“I’ve come to believe that all my past failure and frustrations were actually laying the foundation for the understandings that have created the new level of living I now enjoy.”